CONVERSATIONS WITH TON DELLAMORTE (CALL CENTER AGENT)

Nayon

Uhmmm. Hello?

3:57pmTon

yoh!

3:57pmNayon

Do you speak English?

3:57pmTon

ari nung!

3:57pmNayon

What? I dont understand you!

Can I talk to your manager?

please

3:58pmTon

i'm gonna need your billing and credit card number before i can transfer you over

haha!

kinenam

jam ikaw ba yan?

3:59pmNayon

what? i cant give you my credit card number... however, i can give you the last 4 digits of my social

3:59pmTon

Haymen!

4:00pmNayon

Are you trying to curse me?

I'm gonna sue you!

4:01pmTon

haha!

Si Alvin pala!

4:02pmNayon

English please! Goddamnit!

Can i talk to your manager?

what account is this by the way?

4:04pmTon

What the fuck men! I ain't at work!

Wrong number!

4:05pmNayon

Really? How come? Is this the "Dial an asshole" number?

4:07pmNayon

hey! i'm talking to you!

4:07pmTon

Nope, but I'd be happy to transfer you over Mr. Asshole!

4:07pmNayon

hey! i'm talking to you!

Transfer where? I aint goin nowhere!

4:07pmTon

Would you like to get the number in case we get disconnected during the transfer?

4:08pmNayon

sure... whats the number? wait ill just get my paper and pen

ok whats the number?

4:08pmTon

This would be the right number: 09151844678

4:10pmNayon

hey! thats not a 1 -800 number!

4:10pmTon

its 0915 1844 678

ah no sir

4:11pmNayon

oh i get it, thats the "Fuck i'm retarded" number!

4:11pmTon

that' a direct number

4:11pmNayon

a number to whom?

4:12pmTon

so that you won't have to go through our voice machines anymore

so that you won't have to go through our voice machines anymore

you'll be answered directly by our assholes

4:12pmNayon

oh so your a talking asshole

4:13pmTon

it seems that you misunderstand sir

your in the wrong department!

would you like me send over an asshole for you?

4:13pmNayon

what department is this anyway? the sissy department?

4:16pmNayon

are you still there?

4:16pmTon

This is the Retard Deparment

4:17pmTon

i won't be able to assist you sir unless if your a retard

4:17pmNayon

Retard? Whats an asshole like you doing in the retard department?

4:17pmTon

Seing your situation sir, i guess you are a retard

i do apologize for being unable to properly lookup your brain sir

how may I help you today?

4:19pmNayon

Yeah, you can help by squeezing my penis

Its stuck in your mouth

4:21pmNayon

hEY! sTILL THERE? Cant hear you! Is my penis still stuck in your mouth?

4:22pmTon

I seems that you have a bundled account sir

4:22pmNayon

bundled? no jargons please

4:22pmTon

other than your retard account you're also availed for being an sex maniac bastard

i'm gonna have to put you on hold

4:23pmNayon

i never availed of anything?

4:23pmTon

please stay on the line

4:23pmNayon

hey! you cant put me on hold!

4:24pmTon

♪♫♫♪♪♫

4:24pmNayon

i need action here!

damn! your music sucks!

4:24pmTon

♫♪♫♪♪♪♫

posted by:

zuluwashere